Do you ever feel like you living someone else's life? I've said a couple of times recently that I feel as if I am an actor in my own life, just playing a part... and I'm not a very good actor. I play different roles, depending on what I'm doing, where I am, sometimes playing the part depending on who someone else needs me to be, and only recognizing a small version of myself. It's like I'm watching myself and going really? that's who you decided to be today? It's like my writing, sometimes I feel I am not able to convey what I am trying to say, who I really am, and who I want to be. The only time I truly feel myself is around my husband, dog, cat, and some family and some friends... sometimes. Maybe I'm just having a version of an early mid-life crisis. I do have my 10yr reunion this year, and it's a mile-marker, a reminder of where you thought you would be at this time in life, and where you currently sit. This is not to say I'm not happy with my life, I am lucky in life where others never will be. But, it's all about evaluating, and setting new goals for myself, and then I can get closer to being the true me and not a B version actor of me.
No comments:
Post a Comment